Thursday, August 11, 2011

the harder i fight it the harder it slaps me back.
the stronger i get the weaker i feel.
the more i think the less i know.
the farther i run from it the closer it is.
i get back up only to fall down again.
this is life. my life. and its time to change.

the quest for happiness is cloudy and fraught with indecision and uncertainty.  i dove head first into this mist hoping for the best outcome and though i knew it would be difficult, i only now realize i'm still just navigating the surface.  doing the backstroke in murky waters and going in circles.  just when i get the nerve to do something i find myself treading in fear because the darkness before the light is intimidating. time attempts to push me forward but i'm battling the waves in the storm.  the only recourse is the dreamworld that surrounds me painting pictures of a life that is not my own.  how do you tell someone you've tied yourself to that somewhere along the way that knot unraveled and you might not care to knot and double knot it again?  when will the tempest rest and give me a moment of clarity?

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